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CUSTOMER TESTIMONIALS

Squirrel Underpants Package

"Hi, I'm Lydia. I was so excited when they asked me to talk about Squirrel Underpants! I used to be ashamed to take my own daughter, Laura, to the park because of the naked squirrels. It may sound prudish, but squirrels are just so shameless in their nudity. What am I supposed to say when Laura asks me why she has to wear underpants? These tiny Squirrel Underpants keep my daughter safe, they keep my family safe and they keep America safe. Thanks Squirrel Underpants!"

   
Squirrel Underpants Package

"As a reverend, I know God created squirrels, so they are by default beautiful creatures. However, there is a time and place for everything and looking out in my backyard first thing in the morning while I'm drinking coffee is not the place for naked squirrels. They are like tiny, furry flashers with no shame. Well, I bought some squirrel underpants and now I can enjoy my own backyard without fear of embarrassment. Thank you Squirrel Underpants!"

   
Squirrel Underpants Package

"I'm a local celebrity and I have opinions that matter to people. In my opinion, nothing has contributed more to the moral health of America more than Squirrel Underpants. Whether I'm opening a supermarket or hosting a fundraiser, I am constantly in danger of seeing a naked squirrel. As the Squirrel Underpants movement expands, the chances of my eyes being compromised accidently declines. I was paid for this endorsement."

   
Squirrel Underpants Package

"People think that professional athletes are insensitive and shallow people. This is not true. I have the soul of an artist and, embarrassingly, I find myself crying over issues like squirrel nudity. Squirrel Underpants help me to be the best I can be. Until I found Squirrel Underpants I was failing to live up to my full potential. Now, I know that the future holds unlimited success. Squirrel Underpants, you are the man. "